The Mighty Thor #700

THE BLOOD OF THE NORNS

Written by Jason Aaron
Penciled by ... a LOT of people.
Cover by Russell Dauterman
Published Oct 18, 2017

   Odinson and Karnilla gaze into a vision showing the unworthy Thor back in his glory. She explains to him that Malekith seeks to destroy the roots of the world tree, when suddenly the alarm sounds. Odinson rushes into battle to defend Nornkeep.

Look, I gotta split. Sounds like somebody is breaking into my car.

   Meanwhile, Thor throws a truck off of herself that was unfortunate placed there by She-Hulk. The two heroes, albeit one being obviously confused, trade blows, when Thor does all she can to calm her down. She throws a fuel tanker as Jane reminisces about her day. She'd simply gone into the hospital to receive treatment when she saw Jennifer Walters freaking out. Now engaged in a pretty good battle, she picks up the hulk and flies the two of them into the sky.

Let's FLY!

   In Asgardia, Volstagg walks in chains as a prisoner of the Thunder Guard when they hear something. From afar, his war hammer crashes through the ceiling and he grabs it. The War Thor lives again. And in what I assume is a pointless waste of comic book, we see young Thor. Then we see into the future and god Thor brokering peace. Then we see Black Galactus tearing up planets before being attacked by Ego - the living planet. They fight and Black Galactus eats his arm, later devouring him. A total of about 10 pages. 

I think Jason Aaron called a bunch of people and said "You wanna pencil me up some crap to help fill up this 50 page chronicle?"

   Meanwhile, Loki walks with his reanimated frost giant father before he collapses. When he awakens, Loki explains that during his nap, he slayed what appears to be hundreds of mountain giants, making his father proud. Back in the skies of Midguard, Shehulk and Thor continue their fight while at the World Tree, Odinson fights just as fierce. Karnilla feels though that it won't be enough. She divides the norns up among her guards and begins cutting the threads of fate. 

Woah, cool knife.

   As Malekith's army storms her kingdom, she kills as many as she can before. But it's not enough. The roots are severed at the tree as Odinson runs to her side. He struggles to get to her as she begins to fade. She tells him she saw all the threads of fate - all of their deaths. Before she dies, she mentions Jane as the death they should all fight to prevent... I think anyway.

Yes, go on. Don't let Jane what? Eat dairy? Drink jagermesiter... WHAT?!

   Back at the airport, Jane and Jenn keep it up when she commands Mjolnir to shoot a bunch of cool lightning out and stuff. Unfortunately she's separated from it during the battle. She commands it back to her as she sees a glmpse of Throg, the Thor frog but she is once again reunited with it and flies above in full Thor regalia.

Thor is getting the hell out of this book.

   In the Dark Elf realm, Malekith is declared king, looking forward to the upcoming war. Hela and Thanos fly around in space longing for more deaths. The issue wraps with War Thor heading to somewhere when he's rammed by Toothgnasher. He falls to Old Asgard when suddenly Toothgnasher storms towards a disturbance. A hand reaches out and rips the goats head off. For there stands Mangog - back on Asgard and ready for judgement - and it starts with Volstagg. With that, this incredibly long and partially unnecessary tale is concluded.

Dang Mangog. You scarrrrry!

   Ok, so maybe I never really planned on being a Thor reviewer, mostly because of the characters, worlds, and other objects I can't really pronounce. But like the god of thunder, I need to have courage and just muscle through it. If you're not a regular reader of this book, this is a good jump in point, as this issue did it's best to catch you up with that's going around all over the Norse galaxy. First of all, Jason Aaron is a fantastic writer. If you read Star Wars, it's tough not to be impressed with what he's done there. The regular artist in this book, Russell Dauterman, is also one to watch. For the jist of this book, it was good... although a bit unneeded. Still, if you plan to commit to this series, it's good to catch up. Overall, I give this issue an 8/10.

If you like this review, check out my video of it HERE.

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(Sorry - already sold my personal copy of this one :(

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